A Game of Poker

Sometimes I feel like the dating world can be quiet a bit like playing poker. In fact, there's many similarities. Primarily, there is the trade-off between making it big or playing it safe. As a poker player entering the first round, you have to have a game plan: will you  play a modest and predictable game that will leave you no worse off than when you started, or will you risk losing everything for the chance to win something great?

Much like in poker, dating is a game where one has to risk losing everything in order to win. Otherwise, one is relegated to sitting on the sidelines of love, always wondering what could have been. Finding a partner is really about choosing between passion and safety. The one which you inherently value will determine the path that you take and the experiences that you will have.I don't necessarily think that one path is better than another, but a simple reflection of a person's needs. My mother, for instance, has always valued safety and security as a top priority. Perhaps not incidentally, she married my father, a very loyal and steadfast man. Her life is very stable, safe, and loving. Sometimes I wonder, however, what kind of person she would have been if she chose spontaneity over prudence. Her friend on the other hand, is the complete opposite. She has lived a life full of excitement, intrigue, and amazing experiences. She has been in many so many romantically volatile relationships that she could write a bestseller. She's an incredibly interesting and multi-faceted individual. She, however, is still single and searching while my mother has been married for 25 years. Which scenario is better? I'm not really sure anymore...

In another aspect, love is similar to poker because we can never be sure about the other person's feelings. Although we can spend years honing our people-reading skills, a good poker face can withstand the test of any lie detector. The truth is, we simply do not know. We are operating in the dark, like a submarine honing in on the vibrations of a distant radar. This volatile environment often ends up playing someone as the fool. Its like Victor Hugo's "the Hunchback of Notre Dame;" in the real story, there was no happy ending but a disappointing love triangle. Quasimodo, the story's protagonist, had always been  in love with Esmerelda, the beautiful young gypsy dancer who for her part, was entranced with Phoebus, the handsomely virile Captain of the King's Archers. Although Phoebus was initially intrigued by Esmerelda's attentions, he never could nor wanted to love her. In the end, the only individuals who go what they wanted were  Phoebus and his fiancee, Fleur de Lys, who were both incapable of love and could not see past the superficial. That, right there, is an example of a reality that's never going to be shown in a romance movie.